Craig wears jeans.

Craig wears free shirts he gets from

events.

Both of those things will be gone

When Craig is gone.

Hate glasses?

They’re on Craig.

And they’ll be gone when

Craig is gone.

Craig says we should split up

and search for clues.

What the fuck is this,

Craig?

Are we fucking Scooby doo?

Arf arf.

You know what else dogs do?

Lick their own assholes.

That’s what Ethan told me.

If you take the “I” out of Craig

You get crag.

And that’s a rocky precipice that kills

people.

Craig’s on the swim team.

Craig went in the ocean during spring

break.

Now it has to be drained.

The Samoans are pissed.

Fish is a key component of their diet.

They can’t eat anything else.

Craig is responsible for the death

of an entire race.

Bye, diversity.

Thanks, Craig.

Craig whispers

You’re welcome.