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How to know you’re dating a humor publication staff member

by Jack Wilan

  • The only words you really want to be saying are “I do.”
  • They smell of daisies by the sea: that bright blue, that vast expanse; your mind turns to windswept coastlines and rolling dunes. 
  • The two of you talk and talk and talk; quite suddenly it’s 3am, but you just don’t feel tired. 
  • Their eyes are as deep and soulful as chocolate-dipped cherries and a cup of steamy Starbucks chai.
  • Their body amazes you and you want nothing more than to love every centimeter day after day, night after night, moon after moon.
  • You sip coconut froth together, creamy, luscious and oh so good
  • They insist on Weird Al after sex

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