Way back in the middle ages, in the days of

yore

Someone had a child who was actually a

whore.

And that child’s father did decide,

To name him “Greg.” But his mother sighed,

“How do we spell this name you’ve picked?

I know that my lady parts you’ve often licked,

But that doesn’t make it right to chose such a

name,

Is it Greg or Gregg? It does matter, they aren’t

the same.”

And to that the father made his reply.

He told the truth, though he was tempted to

lie.

“It’s Gregg, you stupid fucking cunt,

now be a doll and pass me a blunt.”

“Gregg!” Though the mother, overcome with

joy.

“It’s the perfect name for my little boy.

Because ‘Gregg’ and ‘egg’ make music together,

And just hearing it makes my heart light as a

feather.

Because Gregg’s blood is yellow like dehydrat-
ed pee,

And wherever he goes they’ll all want to see.

But now he need only state his name to the

folk,

And they will know his blood’s the color of

yolk.