It’s true. Every morning I wake up to “Worst Day Ever” (2005) and cry and every night I cry myself to sleep listening to “I’m Just a Kid” (2002). I know I’m not exactly breaking the mold and contradicting stereotypes like I’m supposed to. But, it’s who I am, damn it! I used to always ask myself ”How Could is Happen To Me” (Untitled, 2004), but now I know that I’m just a lonely ”Astronaut” (2007) waiting to fall in love with “My Alien” (2002).

Okay, it’s true. The band’s new sound just isn’t what it was in ‘02 but that doesn’t mean I don’t long for ”Summer Paradise” (2012, . Sean Paul). But, the haters of SPFs (Simple Plan Fans, duh) and other PPDHs (Pop Punk DieHards) don’t understand that SP is a good cause underneath the very justified, lived-melodrama. To other SPFs who may or may not yet understand how the haters will discriminate against them, I quote probably the band’s most played song: “we’re gonna follow you, you’re gonna solve that mystery. We see you Scooby Doo, we’re coming after you, What’s New Scooby Doo?” (2002-2008). I may still watch an episode of the ninth incarnation of the beloved Hanna-Barbera cartoon everyday, but it’s only because I don’t know which specific episodes play Simple Plan songs during the chase scenes, and when I find them, I mark them in my journal. is is part of my identity as an SPF.

Part of why I wanted to publish this confession was to celebrate my identity, but I also feel that I need to dispel some damaging stereotypes that have been propagated through popular media. No, I do not, nor do most SPFs (or PPDHs), masturbate by rubbing a poster of SP lead singer Pierre Bouvier (PB) on my genitals until they bleed. These kinds of cultural untruths are damaging to us not just as a collective community, but also as individuals who deal with harassment on a daily basis (like the guy in the marching band in the ”I’m Just a Kid” official music video). In truth, many SPFs are not even connected to the SPF community at large and face prejudice with no support system.

In addition to this, I would like to disassociate myself and others from certain factions of the SPF community. No, I have never been involved in the production of a fan-made SP music video. Yes, those atrocities should be condemned and criticized, but the people who do that actually only constitute less than 1% of all SPFs, and to paint us all with one brush is not only unfair, it’s inhumane.

To those who have been the victims of fan-made SP music videos, I say, ”Welcome to My Life” (2004). at’s right, the biggest victims of these fan-made videos are the fans themselves according to a 2011 report by the NCTC (National Center for Terrible Christmas albums and other musical travesties).

Every day I wish we could go back to 2002-2005 era when the PPDH communities were in perfect harmony: the album No Pads, No Helmets… Just Balls featured collaborations with Good Charlotte and Blink-182. It was a time of growth, flourishing, and peace – for Simple Plan, for Pop Punk, for Montreal, and for all of French-Canada.

“This is what I am, this is what I like… and I don’t wanna change, I just wanna have fun” (Grow Up, 2002).