(Omitted: Tisch stacks. I mean come on. Everybody already knows about that one.)

1. The laundry room in DU: DU is a place where many filthy memories are made, but when you break off from your pack of twelve orientation friends to try and get some sexy alone-time with a nameless stranger, this little dark corner is an excellent place to hide

2. The secret pass between Miller and Carm: Find the lonely janitor’s closet on the first floor of Miller. In it will be a small crawl space, lazily concealed by boxes. Move them aside and in you crawl. Finally, a place where your entire floor won’t hear your moans.

3. The little garden shack between South and Latin Way: Many a time has the grass in front of Latin Way been crushed underneath a writhing pair, but better still is that little garden shack just a few yards behind it. The perfect place for a shameless hoe.

4. Eaton: It’s open until 3am almost every night. Just watch out for the cameras ;)

5. Pres Lawn: Even though a tryst in the dark on the damp hill is a little trite, there really is nothing like the thrill of feeling Tony Monaco’s eyes on you as he peeks through the netted curtain of his bedroom window. Our little secret.

6. In the shadow of Hillsides: When a moment of passion takes you breathless uphill, there’s no better place to press up against than the brick wall of Hillsides, always cloaked in darkness and just out of sight. Mmm. What a night.

7. The ramp up to Health Services: When you’re riding that free condom high after getting your throat checked out (not Mono, thank god, just Gonorrhea), sometimes you just get lucky. On a stormy autumn day when there’s seldom a passer-by, it really can be magical.