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Alabama Man Still Reeling About Hit Action Movie Wonder Woman

SLAPOUT, ALABAMA – 42 year-old Bubba Roberts saw the Wonder Woman movie with his wife back in June, but still can’t move past the traumatic experience. “There was a woman fighter,” Roberts explained to us in an interview, “and she did not obey men’s orders. What’s next? Women being able to vote?” We attempted to explain that women could already do that, but he couldn’t understand the concept.

He was also astonished by the idea of an island of only women: “they could get all out of control. How do the women understand things without men there to explain? Last week, my wife forgot the directions to the grocery store and so I had to go all by myself.” His wife, sitting there with him, gave us a knowing look. After the interview, she informed us that she claims forgetfulness sometimes so that she can get some time for herself.

Next we discussed his opinions on the characters after Wonder Woman leaves the island. “Well, I was confused about how many women were prominent characters. I mean, they already have the main character as a woman. What else could they need?” We mentioned that out of at least ten characters that could be qualified as prominent, only three were women. Also, over half the world population is female. Roberts then told us, “No, you’re wrong. Less than half the population is male.” A few seconds of silence ensued. He then continued, “Because there are less men, we need more representation to even out the difference.”

Then, we asked him why he kept posting on Facebook about Wonder Woman, as it’s been a few months and the movie  the Wonder Woman movie with his wife back in June, but still can’t move past the traumatic experience. “There was a woman fighter,” Roberts explained to us in an interview, “and she did not obey men’s orders. What’s next? Women being able to vote?” We attempted to explain that women could already do that, but he couldn’t understand the concept. He was also astonished by the idea of an island of only women: “they could get all out of control. How do the women understand things without men there to explain? Last week, my wife forgot the directions to the grocery store and so I had to go all by myself.” His wife, sitting there with him, gave us a knowing look. After the interview, she informed us that she claims forgetfulness sometimes so that she can get some time for herself. Next we discussed his opinions on the characters after Wonder Woman leaves the island. “Well, I was confused about how many women were prominent characters. I mean, they already have the main character as a woman. What else could they need?” We mentioned that out of at least ten characters that could be qualified as prominent, only three were women. Also, over half the world population is female. Roberts then told us, “No, you’re wrong. Less than half the population is male.” A few seconds of silence ensued. He then continued, “Because there are less men, we need more representation to even out the difference.” Then, we asked him why he kept posting on Facebook about Wonder Woman, as it’s been a few months and the movie is not going to change. “Well, I am scared that they will start adapting movies next…what if they start to recreate my favorite movies, but with women in them? That would be absolute heresy.” We wanted to know what his favorite movie was. “I think I would have to say Ghostbusters. It would be awful bad if women were the main characters.” After another quick staring match, we said goodbye to Roberts and went to the kitchen to say goodbye to his wife. She said, “Don’t tell my husband but I agree with that thing Wonder Woman says. You know, when she says men aren’t real necessary for pleasure? That’s true.” We nodded and told her that we would take that into consideration.