Founded by Chris Lombard (A’17) and Elise Trollop (E’16), Bytylyr aims to connect millennials with the ancient wisdom of the Blood Gods through a series of elaborate locationbased ad hoc brunch reviews.

“Just swipe right to get a delicious brunch hand-delivered to your dorm,” explained Elise. “Or swipe left to channel sticky red blood into the unquenchable maw of the Blood Gods. It’s all there at a touch of button!”

“We first thought of PoorHidr during the last hackathon,” says Anastasia DeHeight. “We kept running into this problem where we would accidentally make friends with people who were poorer than we were. So we developed a credit card swiper-add on for the iPhone that takes all the awkwardness away. Now when you meet someone, when they’re giving you their number, just have them swipe their plastic first. If they turn out to be one of the poors, the app makes it look like your phone is encountering an error and can’t add their number.”

“At the same time,” chimes in her business partner, Martin Bjornson, “PoorHidr calls an Uber for you to make a hasty escape.”

Alisha Gaskins and Clara Capshaw may only be freshmen, but they’re not letting that get in the way. They’ve already changed their Twitter bios to words like “Thinker. Inventor. Thoughtleader.” “Blankyt is like Uber meets Airbnb meets Yelp meets Facebook meets Grindr,” says Alisha. “Picture a Tumblr for former slaveowners. Or like, a Snapchat for a lame duck Congress.” Clara adds. “What if we disrupted education?” Alisha texted me from class, “What if Blankyt became a way for grandparents to get involved in designing the Keystone XL?”

All of the students interviewed in this story have likely dropped out by the time of its publication.